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Showing posts with the label Unwanted journey 04/2020

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I dug my own grave

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I always have dreams almost every night (falling or jumping from high places, losing all my teeth,  dreaming of being late at school, etc) but this dream is different. It's like I’m aware I’m dreaming but there’s nothing I can do to wake up or to make it stop. I was 15 or 16 at the time. I was in a boarding house near my school and I have 4 roommates. The 4 of us share the same room, the room has 2 bunk beds. We have our own restroom and a kitchen. For 4 - 5 days I keep on dreaming of my college Professor whom I dislike. He is so bossy and loves to order us around to do things that are not school related. In my dream, he’s shouting at me and ordering me to carry different things. On the first night, I was carrying a lot of books. Next night I was carrying garden tools like a shovel, watering can, gloves, and plant seeds. This continued for 2 - 3 nights and every time I woke up my arms hurt and they were shaking as if I carried heavy stuff. I am so confused why am I dreaming of him!...
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Part 4: Long journey to recovery

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Previously... Part 3 Part 2 Part 1 I thought the first day of waking up after the surgery was the worst part of it but it's not the worst part is the next day where they removed the painkiller bag attached to my IV. I can now feel 3x the pain. I'm having a lot of difficulties laughing, coughing, sneezing, sitting, standing, and walking. Feels like being 80 years old in your mid-20's. To make everything worse I still have di arrhea. I feel so weak, I still feel chills every now and then. After almost 48 hours, I can finally drink and enjoy my first meal consists of water, soup, tea, and gelatin. Finishing the meal is hard to accomplish given that I'm a person who loves eating. As per the nurse, my appetite will take a week to return but no need to hurry up. What's important is there are no complications. To make sure there's no infection they always check  Jackson-Pratt_drain  and I'm also given 2 kinds of anti-biotic that sting whenever...
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Part 3: The cut

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Part 2 Part 1 It’s 10:15pm, I was laying on the bed while the nurse was pushing my bed towards the Operating room. My heartbeat is racing, I’m not sure if I’m scared or excited about this incident.  I can’t stop thinking is this it? Is this the end? What will happen to me after this?  I’ve been on sick leave (SL) for more than a week and after the surgery will surely extend for several more weeks and I only have 16 VL/SL left. I’m thinking will my health card cover this procedure? Or I’ll need to ask for money from my mom? Too many questions that I can’t answer, all I can do is cry. Soon we arrived in the operating room. The moment I entered the room everything was in slow motion the anesthesiologist was talking to me but I’m having difficulty in understanding. The next thing I know I was given spinal anesthesia. --- -I thought it would hurt a lot but wooooh! it did not.  The next thing I know was waking up with an oxygen mask and brown stain on m...
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Part 2: The ride continues

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Click here to check part 1 When the bleeding stops I thought everything will be back to normal but I was wrong. Yes, the bleeding and cramps stop however my stomach is so bloated I can’t even fart. I can’t also poop, I thought it's just indigestion which happens to me most of the time. This is different. I'm starting to feel intermittent stabbing pain in my stomach. --- Is this gastroenteritis? I ignored the pain and just continued with my daily quarantine life. I sleep most of the time, I wake up to take a bath, to cook food or to wash the dishes. I woke up one afternoon sweating and having chills. I told Levin (my live-in partner) that I don’t feel good, he checked my temperature and it’s 38.1C. (On my mind) Is this Corona? Then I remembered everything that happened 2 days ago. I know death is inevitable but I don’t want to die now. Levin humorously said “Oooh, Corona” I looked him dead in the eye and he just laughed and said you don’t have a cough or a cold you’ll ...
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Part 1: A roller coaster ride with Covid on the side

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I had this blog for a while but this is the first time I’m going to share something about my personal life. As we all know, everyone is affected by the ongoing pandemic. But the story I’m going to share is not about that - ish. It’s about what I experienced last month, April 2020. It all started when I got a monthly period --- nothing new about that. What's strange is that it took more than 10 days than the usual 5 - 7 days and the cramps I’m experiencing are getting worse everyday. On the 11th day of my bleeding, my live-in partner insisted on going to the hospital. After several hours of convincing I finally agreed to him. I promise him we’ll go tomorrow morning (April 22, 2020) -- since it's already 7pm at the time (we don’t have a car) and due to Covid-19 we have a curfew of 8pm. In the morning we posted a car request on a Facebook page --- and it’s so expensive 3x the usual price but it’s okay everyone needs ways to get money since everything was closed. We arr...
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